Top 35+ Funny Quotes About Age

Funny Quotes About Age – Everyone deals with getting older differently Among the ways that people face aging is making jokes that come with getting older. These jokes can range from the physical changes that come from aging to joking about things that are considered old today. Growing old doesn’t have to be something sad. While there are plenty of thoughtful quotes about time and taking one step at a time, you can still have fun with getting older. These funny quotes about age show just how:

• “Aging seems to be the only available way to live a long life.”
  – Kitty O’Neill Collins
• “Old age is an excellent time for outrage. My goal is to say or do at least one outrageous thing every week.”
  – Maggie Kuhn
• “Old age is always fifteen years older than I am.”
  – Oliver Wendell Holmes
• “I feel about aging the way William Saroyan said he felt about death: ‘Everybody has to do it,’ but I always believed an exception would be made in my case.”
  – Martha Beck
• “I don’t feel old. I don’t feel anything until noon. Then it’s time for my nap.”
  – Bob Hope
• “Don’t let aging get you down. It’s too hard to get back up.”
  – John Wagner
• “Age is something that doesn’t matter unless you are a cheese.”
  – Luis Bunuel
• “I’m very pleased to be here. Let’s face it, at my age, I’m very pleased to be anywhere.”
  – George Burns
• “You know you’re getting old when the candles cost more than the cake.”
  – Bob Hope
• “You are only young once, but you can stay immature indefinitely.”
  – Ogden Nash
• “There are six myths about old age: 1) that it’s a disease, a disaster. 2) That we are mindless. 3) That we are sexless. 4) That we are useless. 5) That we are powerless. 6) That we are all alike.”
  – Maggie Kuhn
• “Your 40s are good. Your 50s are great. Your 60s are fab. And 70 is f*@king awesome!”
  – Helen Mirren
• “I don’t let my age define me, but the side-effects are getting harder to ignore.”
• “Life is like a roll of toilet paper. The closer you get to the end, the faster it goes.”
• “Respect old people. They graduated from high school without Google or Wikipedia.”

Additional Funny Quotes About Age

• “We don’t grow older, we grow riper.”
  – Pablo Picasso
• “If you’re not getting older, you’re dead.”
  – Tom Petty
• “You know you’re getting old when you stoop to tie your shoelaces and wonder what else you could do while you’re down there.”
  – George Burns
• “I don’t plan to grow old gracefully. I plan to have face-lifts until my ears meet.”
  – Rita Rudner
• Some guy said to me: ‘Don’t you think you’re too old to sing rock n roll?’ I said: ‘You’d better check with Mick Jagger.’”
  – Cher
• “I’m getting older , so I’m quieting down a bit.”
  – Steve Coogan
• “Some folks as they grow older grow wise but most folks simply grow stubborner.”
  – Josh Billings
• “People ask me what I’d most appreciate getting for my eighty-seventh birthday. I tell them, a paternity suit.”
  – George Burns
• “When it comes to staying young, a mind-lift beats a face-lift any day.”
  – Marty Buccella
• “I can honestly say I love getting older. Then again, I never put my glasses on before looking in the mirror.”
  – Cherie Lunghi
• “The really frightening thing about middle age is that you know you’ll grow out of it.”
  – Doris Day
• “The good thing about getting older is that, as you become less attractive, you have less desire to go out and conquer everyone you see.”
  – Julian Clary
• “As you get older, three things happen. The first is your memory goes, and the I can’t remember the other two.”
  – Sir Norman Wisdom
• “Middle age occurs when you are too young to take up golf and too old to rush up to the net.”
  – Franklin Pierce Adams
• “It’s not easy getting old, you know. Things become a lot less clear.”
  – Jonathan Evison

Other Funny Lines About Aging

• “If you’re not going to get any wiser, what’s the point of getting older?”
  – Elizabeth Lowell
• “It’s sad to grow old, but nice to ripen.”
  – Brigitte Bardot
• “Someone once said that you can make the choice between getting old and getting creepy, and I think getting old is the way to go.”
  – Kate Beckinsale
• “You’re getting old when the only thing you want for your birthday is not to be reminded of it.”
  – Felix Severn
• “You know you’re getting old when you get that one candle on the cake. It’s like, ‘See if you can blow this out.’”
  – Jerry Seinfeld
• “Please don’t retouch my wrinkles. It took me so long to earn them.”
  – Anna Magnani

To enjoy even more lines relating to age and time, check out our “Missing my Grandchildren Quotes” and “Take One Day at a Time Quotes.”