Jokes
50 Fun and Hilarious January Jokes
January Jokes – When you think of January you usually think of the new year and the opportunities it brings. But do you know it’s also a month you can be made funny? Just about any month in the year can be made funny with a few good jokes.
There are all kinds of jokes about January, whether it be clever quips about things related to the month or punny lines. While jokes about a month are not for everyone, they can still be fun to share. If you are looking to have fun with some hilarious January jokes, here are a few great examples:
- What do you say on the 1st of January? Last year just seems like yesterday!
- What’s a New Years resolution? A to-do list for the first week of January
- Why shouldn’t you kiss someone on January 1st? Because it’s the first date.
- How many seconds are in a year? 12! January second, February second, March second…
- If January threw a parade would February march? No, but April may!
- How was the snow globe feeling in January? A little shaken!
- What’s the best thing about January? No more Christmas Carollers!
- What do you have in December that you don’t have in January? The letter D.
- Is January the longest month? No, September has 2 more letters in its name.
- What did the bank robber announce on January 1st? His New Year’s restitutions
- Why did the jazz musician play his trumpet outside during January? Because he liked cool music.
- Dry January is going really well, even if everyone keeps saying that I need to shower.
- I think Christmas should be moved to January. The stores are less crowded and everything is on sale.
- Which month does the Brady Bunch like most? JANuary.
- What was the first thing said on January 1, 2021? Hindsight is 2020.
- January — the one time of the year when “going to the bar” means going to lift weights.
- January 6th is National Bean Day, which also makes it hold your breath day.
- My teacher wanted me to spell January, I said easy, “01”.
- I lost 199 pounds at the gym this year. I forgot to cancel my membership after January.
- Me and my childhood crush are marrying next year. Hers is in January and mine in June.
Clever and Cheeky January Jokes
- If all the months of the calendar had a race, who would win? January. It always finishes first.
- Why does everyone work out in January? Because they need to lift their spirits after the holiday is over.
- Where should you keep your money in January? In a slush fund!
- Why is it better to start your diet in December instead of January? Because that’s the best way to have a happy new rear!
- What’s for breakfast on really cold January days? Snowflakes.
- What is the best way to get to school in January? By icicle!
- How do you stay warm in January? You cover yourself in a blanket of snow!
- What do you call a temper tantrum that a snowman throws in January? A meltdown.
- Where do storm troopers go to warm up on cold January days? The Darth Mall.
- Why was the computer screen so pixelated on January 1st? It was its New Year’s resolution.
- Why did the chicken go to the gym in January? To work out his pecks!
- Did you hear about the crazy treadmill sales at Costco and Sam’s Club in January? They will give you a run for your money!
- Why do hamburgers always look better in January? They have spent the month at the gym working out to get better buns!
- Why do bad cooks always have the best success losing weight in January? Because they are experts at burning calories!
- Why should you work out with a priest in January? To exorcise your demons!
Additional Punny Jokes
- Who helped Cinderella with her New Year’s Resolutions? Her Janufairy Godmother.
- What is the first month of the year in Transyvania? Janu-eerie.
- What does Bigfoot call January? Januhairy.
- What do you call milk made in the first month of the year? Janu-dairy!
- What do some couples do during the first month of the year? Get Janumarried.
- Where do you find Google during January? The Winternet.
- How does January stay in shape for the spring? It does day-ly workouts!
- What do you call a nice ghost on a cold January night? Casp-burr.
- What’s the best food to eat in January? Brrr-itos!
- What is the pig’s favorite month? HAMuary!
- What do you call a person who can’t keep their January diet resolutions? A dessert-er!
- Everyone knows about the January wasp, but Maybee not.
- What do you call a shape who gets into an accident on his way back to school in January? A wreck-tangle!
- This January, my New Year’s resolution is to break tread with you!
- January is so cold it should be called Janubuurry.
If you want to check out more hilarious jokes, you can check out our New Year Jokes and Jokes About Autumn.