50 of the Most Hilarious Mom Jokes

Mom Jokes – Everyone knows about dad jokes but do you know about mom jokes? And no, not “Yo Mama” jokes. You’ll find that there is a range of jokes that covers the ups and downs of motherhood and other jokes that cheekily talks about the power of moms. Of course, there are plenty of mom-related puns, but there are more than a few jokes that moms say about the things they have to deal with in their day-to-day life. Being a mom isn’t easy and sometimes humor is a way to deal with things. So if you want to check out something outside of good morning lines for moms or sweet messages for her, here are a few Mom Jokes to bring a laugh:

• You know you’re a mom when picking up another human to smell their butt isn’t only normal, but necessary.
• I hate when I’m waiting for mom to cook dinner and then I remember I am the mom, and I have to cook dinner.
• You know you’re a mom when you understand why Mama Bear’s porridge was too cold.
• Silence is golden. Unless you have kids, then silence is suspicious.
• My nickname is Mom. But my full name is “Mom Mom Mom Mom Mom.”
• Motherhood is fun and all, but have you ever had the house alone on a Saturday?
• I don’t want to sleep like a baby. I want to sleep like my husband.
• Whoever wrote the song “Easy Like Sunday Morning” did not have kids.
• At my age I’m no longer a snack; I’m a Happy Meal. I come with toys and kids.
• “It’s spicy” is universal mom code for “I don’t want to share.”
• Yes, please get a new cup every time you need water — said no mom ever.
• Mom’s recipe for iced coffee: Have kids. Make coffee. Forget you made coffee. Put it in the microwave. Forget you put it in the microwave. Drink it cold.
• Motherhood: When changing from plaid flannel PJs into black yoga pants qualifies as “getting dressed.”
• Spit up is my new favorite accessory; no outfit is complete without it.
• My housekeeping style as a mom can best be described as “there appears to have been a struggle.”

More Mom Jokes

Just as there are jokes from moms about motherhood, there are hilarious jokes about the power of moms. Here’s a mix of the two:

• Before having kids, every mom thinks she’ll be a super-chill mom. That’s because, at that point, we had no idea they’d break all our stuff, make ridiculous demands, and take roughly 10 years to get out of the car.
• When my kid tells me they got hurt doing exactly what I told them to stop doing so they wouldn’t get hurt, I say, “Oh noooooo…”
• “I love all my children equally. Except for the one that sleeps… I love that one more.” 
• Please excuse the mess! My kids are making memories of me yelling at them. To clean up the mess
• What’s the fastest land mammal? A toddler who’s been asked what’s in their mouth.
• Mom: The amazing ability to hear a sneeze through closed doors, in the middle of the night, three bedrooms away — while daddy snores next to you.
• Mother: (n.) One person who does the work of 20 for free.
• Never doubt a mother! She can carry a screaming toddler, two gallons of milk, talk on her cell phone, and still shoot you daggers for looking at her crazy.
• Don’t wake up mom! There are at least seven species that eat their young. Your mom may be one of them.
• When your mom’s voice is so loud, even your neighbors brush their teeth and get dressed.
• “If at first you don’t succeed… try doing it the way Mom told you to in the beginning.”
• Nothing is really lost until Mom can’t find it. 
• There are two amounts of pasta moms are good at cooking: Not enough and enough for 3,000 people.
• Bought my mom a mug that says, “Happy Mother’s Day from the World’s Worst Son.” I forgot to mail it, but I think she knows.
• Roses are red, Violets are blue. My mom’s jokes, Are funnier than you.
• She believed she could, and she almost did… But then someone asked her repeatedly for a snack and she totally lost track of what she was doing.
• What are the three quickest ways to spread a rumor? The internet, telephone, and telling your mom.
• I asked a police recruit during an exam, “What would you do if you had to arrest your own mother?” He said, “Call for backup.”
• What is a jumper? Something you wear when your mother gets cold.
• Science teacher: “When is the boiling point reached?” Student: “When my mother sees my report card!”

Punny Mom Jokes

Just as there is a range of puns in Dad Jokes, there is also a share of puns among Mom Jokes like the following:

• Why is a computer so smart? Because it listens to its motherboard.
• What do you call a small mom? Minimum.
• Why was it so hard for the pirate to call his mom? Because she left the phone off the hook.
• I stubbed my toe and my mom shouted at me for yelling, “What the duck!” She was angry that I used fowl language.
• What is a mom’s favorite flower? Chrysanthemums.
• What did the mama say to the foal? “It’s pasture your bedtime.”
• What warm drink helps mom relax? Calm-omile tea.
• Why did the bean children give their mom a sweater? She was chili.
• Why did the cookie cry? Because his mother was a wafer so long!
• What did the panda give his mommy? A bear hug.

Jokes from Comedians

We all hear a fair share of jokes from different comedians, there are even a few comedians with famous quotes. Among these comedians and many funny figures are moms who have given hilarious takes on motherhood like the following:

If you enjoyed these jokes, you may also enjoy some “Silly Jokes for Friends.”