Jokes

50 Hilarious Santa Jokes for Christmas

santa jokes

Santa Jokes – Santa Claus is a prime figure of the Christmas season. While there are various opinions about the jolly figure, there is no denying that the idea and image of Santa is a staple in the holidays. From decorations to multiple movies, there is no shortage of ways that Santa is depicted during the holidays. Like any other holiday staple, there are more than a few jokes about the gift deliverer. Whether it be punny lines involving his name to clever jokes about his job, there are plenty of Santa jokes to enjoy. Here are a few memorable ones to make your holidays brighter:

  • How much did Santa’s sleigh cost? It was on the house.
  • What do you call Santa when he’s wearing ear muffs? Anything, he can’t hear you.
  • Who automatically gets added to the nice list? Anyone who cleans their chimney.
  • What smells the most in Santa’s sleigh? Santa’s nose.
  • What does Santa pack when he goes on a tropical getaway? A red suit.
  • Why wouldn’t you want to get into a fight with Santa? He has a black belt.
  • Which of Santa’s friends is the most chill? Jack Frost.
  • What kind of weather is Santa’s favorite? Sweater weather
  • What does Santa say on the night of Christmas? “Time to hit the sack!”
  • Why couldn’t Santa have cereal in the morning? All of his bowls were filled with jelly.
  • What do Santa’s elves drive to work? Minivans.
  • How did Santa respond when Mrs. Claus told him he forgot something from the store? “But I checked the shopping list twice!”
  • What’s the difference between a knight and Santa Claus? One slays a dragon, the other drags a sleigh.
  • What does Mrs. Claus sing to Santa on his birthday? “Freeze a jolly good fellow!”
  • Which of Santa’s reindeer has the best moves? Dancer.

Clever Santa Jokes

  • What kind of bread did Santa make during quarantine? Gingerbread.
  • What do Santa and Mrs. Claus play on game night? Reindeer games.
  • What’s Santa’s favorite kind of roll? Carols.
  • What do Santa’s elves use to help them walk in the slippery snow? Candy canes.
  • How do elves respond when Santa takes attendance? “Present!”
  • What did Mrs. Claus say to Santa as she looked up at the sky? “Looks like rain, dear.”
  • What did the elves call Santa when he accidentally stepped on a bag of cashews? A nutcracker.
  • What do a tree farm and salon have in common? Trimmings.
  • What’s Santa’s go-to fast food order? A frosty.
  • What nationality is Santa Claus? North Polish.
  • Who automatically gets added to the naughty list? A rebel without a clause.
  • What is Santa’s dog’s name? Santa Paws.
  • What would Santa be called if he went down a chimney with the fire going? Crisp Kringle.
  • What do you call an elf who sings? A wrapper.
  • What did the ocean say when Santa flew over? Nothing. It just waved.

Other Punny Jokes

  • What goes “oh-oh-oh?” Santa walking backward.
  • Where does Santa stay on vacation? A ho-ho-hotel.
  • Whenever someone asks Santa for help with their Christmas tree, what does he say? “Fir sure!”
  • What kind of drink does Santa give to naughty girls and boys? Coal-a.
  • What’s Santa’s go-to doughnut order? A jolly-filled doughnut.
  • Why is the alphabet in the North Pole different than the normal alphabet? The North Pole’s alphabet has noel.
  • What was one of Santa’s helpers called who kept making toys for himself? S-elf-ish.
  • Who’s Santa’s favorite singer? Elfish Presley.
  • Why does Santa feel indebted to the elves? Because he’s an elf-made man.
  • Why are elves such great motivational speakers? They have plenty of elf-confidence.
  • What did one of Santa’s helpers say to the other? Let’s take an elfie.
  • When Santa doesn’t want to do something, what does he say? “Snow thanks!”
  • What breakfast do Santa and his wife like to eat together? Mistle-toast.
  • What was wrong with the Grinch on Christmas? He was feeling claus-trophobic.
  • Why was Santa having money problems? He was nickel-less.
  • Why does Mrs. Claus love the Christmas season? It makes her feel so santa-mental.
  • Why does Santa use the chimney? Because it soots him.
  • Where does Santa store his suit? In his Claus-et.
  • What name does Santa use to check in at hotels on beach vacations? Sandy Claus.
  • Why does Santa use GPS? He doesn’t want to be a lost Claus.

If you liked these jokes, check out our Presents Jokes for Christmas and Cold Weather Jokes.

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